Waaaah, I posted an entry earlier during the afternoon while I was at an internet cafe, and just when I clicked "post entry", the server was down. So a few minutes ago, I decided to write down as much as I can remember. Then I accidentally pressed the backspace key while the cursor wasn't in the darn text box, so when I got back to the control panel, everything was gone.

I think I blew a phone interview last Monday afternoon. Due to this Greenstage production that I committed to in the first place, I was hoping for a part-time slot. But apparently, they're only accepting people who would work full-time. Rawr.

I heard from Krystal that she might not be able to work for Atlantis' production of Beauty and The Beast because it all depends on her work schedule. If she were to go on leave, she'd rather choose to do it while she was working at Aida with Bito. Karen's also having second thoughts about it, I heard.

I still have to talk to Miss Bernice, though. I sure do hope she'd hire me. I think I disappointed her last Sunday. Man, I sure do hope I won't be the only one from the usual crowd backstage if ever I do get hired. Of course, they'd ask me to get more OJTs from CSB if that were to happen. I'd probably get the ones who won't be doing their thesis next term.

Then there's Playshop. (Thanks for the info, Jennie.) I still have to contact the Trumpets office for that. I could apply as administrative assistant. But then again, there's another dilemma. If I get an admin job, and get hired to be in B&B, it's gonna be real tough to juggle.

Ngek, ang kapal ko naman to think that I'd get hired in both.

Think, think, think...

Oh help.

Too many requests of the same thing.
Easy lang, people.
I can only do so much, so don't expect.
Or please, just don't keep asking me na lang.
Sorry.

Sorry for the cryptic post. Too much thinking during this quiet time. I've been talking to various people today about different stuff, and everything was suddenly a blur.

The result is this weird post you're reading right now.
And a funny usericon, hahaha. That pic was taken during a shoot in school that required me to play a mime that was also a cellphone bandit.

Speaking of mimes, did you guys catch that mime in the last episode of American Idol? The crazy things people do for fame.

I don't know what's wrong. It just happened.

While I was about to leave Taft for home this evening, I started feeling depressed, for absolutely no reason at all. I couldn't figure it out. Things were pretty OK lately, but when I stepped into the elevator, I was already on the verge of tears.

This is the first time it happened to me. It's frustrating.

Damn it, Hogi. What's wrong with you?

Lazy Sunday today. Nothing much to do.

Last Friday, a bunch of us played hooky from rehearsal to watch Tanghalang Pilipino's "'Yun Na Nga, Kung 'Yun Na Nga" (It Is So (If You Say It's So) in English). There was Mish, Drei, Nicco, Miko and me.

Hahaha, the play was hilarious. I couldn't get over the funny dialogue, the colorful costumes, and the "characteristic" expressions. And the food, hahaha. Yes, the actors ate the whole time. There were green mangoes, shingaling, suman, broas, buto ng pakwan, polvoron, popcorn, bananas, and cupcakes. Hahaha, I got hungry watching them eat.

Yesterday, Drei, Nicco and I were an hour an a half late to rehearsal. Only about half of us were there, though. We just blocked the first couple of scenes of Act 2, with Sir Jethro happy to do the cameo as the designer wardrobe...

Sir Jethro: (in this very gay excited tone) Let's see what we have in my drawers! Versace, Armani... Penshoppe?! How embarassing!
Wahahahahahahaha!

Then I had to do this movement piece. Gak. I felt very self-conscious at first. Oh well.

After rehearsal, Drei, Nicco and I retreated to the condo. We were supposed to go to Southridge for Fathers' Day that Rain and Prof invited us to (hahaha, they're getting us free tickets), but then decided not to go anymore. We ended up watching a couple of Friends episodes and Three, Part 2 with Mish.

*shudder* We watched the first Three before, and it was pretty cool, but the 2nd Three was quite disturbing. Specially Dumpling and Cut. Igh. Films like those beat all those horror movies with all those ghosts and stuff. These are demented people, hahaha. In some way, I did like the films, though. It matched how much I enjoyed Identity and The Village.

Then the four of us went to the south to meet with Rain at Starbucks ATC. Sat around for a while as we waited for him (who said that he was already on his way there from Southridge while we were still on the highway, hahaha). We even decided to walk around the area near Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf, and ended up playing around at the kiddie slides.

The four of us then said goodbye to Rain and retreated to Drei's car in the parking area. After a while, we decided to go to Drei's house instead. So off we went, and sat in front of the TV watching the last third of American Pie 3: The Wedding and yet another episode of Friends.

Quiet time after Friends. 'Nuff said. Tama na kasi drama, hehehe.

Last Sunday, I suddenly decided to have my hair cut. So before going to Taft, I had about 4-5 inches of hair cut. Wheee... For the first time in a long time, a stranger knew the exact length I wanted. Usually I end up with hair longer or worse, shorter than my desired cut. And I hardly even go out to have a hair cut.

Then I headed to Taft. The Beauty and the Beast cast had scheduled a pictorial during the evening at the prod and tech students' Cinmato class under Sir Dong. As usual, the cast was told to wear all black outfits. But with a black background as well? We might look like floating heads. Oh well, but the shots look pretty great when we checked it out in Sir Dong's camera.

(Check it out...)

My hair before I had it cut...



Igh, I don't like the long layers anymore.


So here I am with my new cut...



Hahaha, ignore the head in the corner. That's Rian from behind the curtain during our pictorial.

Ay, que vain.

If you read this journal, even if I don't speak to you often, post a memory of me.
It can be anything you want. It can be good or bad -- just so long as it happened.

Then post this on your journal. See what people remember about you...

While sitting on a couch yesterday at Starbucks with a bunch of other friends, we actually managed to think of a brand new play concept to write. It's a challenge, but it would be interesting. And it also takes place at a coffee shop.

It's funny how we manage to think a lot while in Starbucks.

Valentine's Day just ended.

I was invited to spend the day with a bunch of singles-- Mish, Nicco, Drei, Ting, Lye and Ann (with a guy friend) at Robinson's Place. Supposedly it was to keep Erin from being lonely while Jao is in the US, but she decided to cancel.

Had lunch at Chef D'Angelo and stuffed ourselves. I got a text message from Rain asking where we were so I told him to catch up with us at Rob Place.

Nikki finally managed to catch up with us when we were about to watch a movie. Rain had to go back to school because he still had class. Half of us couldn't decide which movie to watch while the other half was OK with whatever movie. Hahaha, I, on the other hand, was all set on watching Phantom of the Opera. We decided to flip for it, Flight of the Phoenix against Phantom of the Opera. The latter won, yay.

Emmy Rossum was OK. Hahaha, Nikki said that she looked like Angelica Jones. Minnie Driver as Carlotta the diva was totally amusing. When I heard the overture in the beginning, I had suddenly had goosebumps, hahahaha. I even caught myself mouthing or even humming some of the songs. But for some reason I didn't really enjoy listening to Gerard Butler as the Phantom. I felt as if there was something lacking in his voice. Oh well, to each his own. I still enjoyed this movie musical better than Moulin Rouge. No offense to those who like that movie better, though.

Oh yeah, for Nikki. All the actors in the film did their own singing, except for Minnie Driver.

Hahaha, one part I just had to laugh at was somewhere in the beginning, when I heard the lines "Grovel, grovel," which was actually a tribute to Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (ahem), another work by Andrew Lloyd Webber.

Found this site. It compares the film and stage version of the musical.

So where was I?

Drei, Nicco, Lye, Ting and Ann had to leave sometime after we started the movie over because they had to go back to school for class so Nikki, Mish and I stayed in the cinema. After about 15 minutes, Mish said that she also had to go back to school to do some research in the library so we left as well.

Nikki and I wound up sitting and talking in McDo for about 3 hours, hahaha. Ended up waiting for almost nothing, ehehehe. Go figure. So we went to Starbucks and talked more hours away before going home.

I have this habit of sometimes looking through my old blog entries from the past year and sort of compare it to this year.

Last year, I became attached to quite a bunch of friends. Even though some things feel through, we still kept a bond going. I even remember that I always get a text message practically every day that said "Werka?" Hahaha, Maika, kilala mo kung sino yun?

Like I said in a past entry a few months ago, I noticed that I have different groups of friends every year in college.

This year, I'm with a new group of friends. One thing that didn't change though, are the text messages, looking for each other ("San ka?"). Usually, I'm the one who executes, hahaha.

Yesterday (referring to the date this entry was written), I tried to refrain from doing so, except when I decided to meet up with Nikki after her class. I don't know why I did it; probably because I wanted a little change, or maybe because of brooding (a result of what, I have no idea). Hahaha, so when Nicco and Drei found the two of us inside school when today's non-existent rehearsal was about to start, they both asked me why I didn't text them. Ano ba yan. Why does it always have to be me? Nyak. Drama, hahaha.

Anyway, where was I? Well, I have this thing about attachment. I get clingy with friends yet I couldn't help but drift apart from one group to another due to some circumstances. Like graduations, job and school schedules, sudden change of interests, stuff like that.

Once again, I'm partly anticipating and partly dreading it will happen again.

Past midnight post, per usual.

Thinking too much. Maybe because I had too much alone time earlier before I met up with my other friends.

I miss talking with certain people. I miss late night talks over the phone until my eyes get heavy and my mind starts to swim. Though Rain's unexpected phone calls due to trivial or cryptic stuff are very comforting (naaaaks! Thanks for the concern lagi, Rain!). I miss sitting in McDo or (the now defunct) AKU talking the hours away over iced tea and pasta (paging Maika, Dandan and the Ilacads! Hehehe...).

Don't get me wrong. I still get to enjoy talking with good friends these days. I appreciate the company very much. I just miss the people I used to be with.

Nyak. Drama.

Wrote this down while I was sitting in KFC earlier...
OK, so here's what I've been noticing. Because I'm now fully aware about the cliques I go with, I think I've been subconsciously and gradually trying to detach myself. Yet, I'm still reluctant of what I'm doing.

The things that pop into my mind when I'm alone, hahaha.

Work has found me after CSB's school production. Hopefully.

Next topic please.

Went to St Scho to watch Ang Mga Mukha at Awit ni Pag-ibig, a post-Valentines concert by Pam, Alex, Kat and Myra that served as their thesis. Hahaha, initially, I went there because I wanted to watch the Akafellas (which I haven't in ages), plus Rian and Rie. Huwaw, I never realized that the other acapella group, the Bystanders, was also quite impressive. One guy looked like Rony, and another guy looked like Nyoy. Hahahaha. They were so comical when they were singing "Sinaktan Mo Ang Puso Ko," specially the bass guy and the beatboxer.

After being makulit and uber awake during the ride home earlier (blame it on the free coffee I got before the show), sleep is finally kicking in. G'night, world.

Last Saturday, I have to admit but rehearsal was boring. Nearly everyone had other commitments, so a handful of us just ended up throwing lines to each other.

I happened to mentioned that Mass is already running at the CCP, and I wanted to see that play, because I read the book by F. Sionil Jose at least a couple of times in high school and even in 1st year college for book reports. Sir Jethro's the sound designer for the show so kinapalan na namin mga mukha namin. Drei, Nicco and I sent a text message to Sir Jethro, asking if he could get us in the play as guests because we didn't bring money for tickets. Hahahaha.

We didn't get a reply until after Drei and Nicco's pictorial during the afternoon until early evening for Intersection (Stephen's thesis). Yay, we're in.

During the pictorial, I watched the cast and crew from where I was sitting on the floor. Most of them came from PHSA (Philippine High School for the Arts). Outgoing, loud, and wacky. I actually got intimidated by them. But back when I was in 6th or 7th grade, when that particular school was featured on TV, I actually considered wanting to go there and pursue theater arts. Even more in 7th grade because I was bitten by the acting bug. Parents didn't go for it, specially because I was ever so dependent on them. No go about living in a dorm in Makiling, hahaha. But imagine if I had really gone there. Would I have shed my shyness earlier? Possibly, of course.

Mish joined us to CCP and we all chipped in for her ticket because Sir Jethro only left 3 guest slots for us. Miss Cindy and Sir Vince were also there to watch.

The play was pretty interesting. True to the book, but of they had to leave out some other stuff because if they didn't, the show would last an hour longer, hahaha.

I got a text from Jun while we were having an uber-late dinner in the condo. Apparently he needed help for a concert the following day. A little concert by some teachers from UST's Conservatory of Music in Ayala Alabang's Narra park. Low pay, but I accepted it. Free food and transportation allowance is payment enough for me, hehehe, but at least there's a bit of extra.

So yesterday afternoon, Jun and I headed for Narra Park. Actually, there wasn't really much to do. Because the show was free to the public, I invited a few friends to come watch. Drei and Nicco were the only ones available, per usual. Anyway, I spent a good deal of sitting around, and I even got to watch the awarding ceremonies of the village's garden club. Hahaha, because there wasn't a dress code, there were people so dressed up, and others in pretty casual clothes.

Ecel arrived after the awarding with her 'rents, so I finally found some company. Hahaha, Jun got her as the unofficial photographer for the night.

During the show, I spent the time sitting backstage to keep an eye on the artists' stuff. Plus for some reason, I didn't want to mingle with the crowd, ahehehe. The artists' voices were amazing. Grrr... if only I had voices like theirs. Their repertoire consisted of classical, a couple of song from The Phantom of the Opera, and Filipino songs.

After the show, Drei, Nicco and I went off to ATC. Yay, Subway sandwiches, yum. Then we fooled around at Timezone until we ended up just sitting in the parking area.

Here's something interesting. Learning how to refuse and say no without being rude. Some people can be too nice that they end up being a doormat. Been there lotsa times. How do other people do it?

Found this on in one of my LJ friends' posts, and I found it interesting...

Friendships are supposed to enhance your life and make you feel special, supported and loved. Do yours? If you've been having doubts about a bud, ask yourself the following:

1. Do you trust her/him?

2. Does your friend treat you well?

3. Do you feel you get a lot from the friendship?

4. Is your friend there for you when you're having a rough time?

5. Do you think she/he would stand up for you if others trashed you?

6. Does your friend respect you (your opinions, morals, concerns, interests, etc.) and your stuff (clothes, CDs, books, etc.)?

7. Do you have several interests/activities in common?

8. Are you able to disagree occasionally without feeling abused for dissed?

9. Do you look forward to seeing this person and feel like "something's missing" when you don't see her/him?

10. Do other people you care about have a high opinion of this person?

Hopefully, you immediately thought "yes" in response to at least eight of the questions. No? Then you might be in a negative relationship that's anything but true friendship. If the person is only around you peripherally, it's probably no biggie, but if she or he is heavily involved in your life, you may want to gather the strength to walk away. By freeing yourself from a rotten relationship, you'll be able to find the kind of friends you deserve.

Despite the non-working holiday, we still had play rehearsals. Hahaha, we had to whole school (well, we just used the dance room) to ourselves.

First went to Drei's condo in the morning to help him and Nicco with the Enrique (our version of Lumiere) and Roberto (Cogsworth) puppets. Nicco was already working on the papier-mache head of Roberto, and Drei set me to work on stringing the parts of Enrique's body.

The three of us ended up being 2 hours late for rehearsal, hahaha.

One lesson I keep on forgetting. Don't sing the song as you've heard from the soundtrack, hahaha. Trust the music scores, ehehehe. Thank you, Sir Jethro. I was about to ask someone else for help with one of the songs, but because our schedules wouldn't match, we couldn't find the time for it.

After rehearsal, Rosch, Nicco, Drei and I went off to Robinson's Place to watch a movie. We didn't know what movie to watch at first, and decided on the first movie whose poster we saw, which was A Series Of Unfortunate Events. Then again, we decided to check out the other movies, and we ended up settling on Infection.

No regrets. Hahaha, no matter how crazy we were in the movie theater, we still enjoyed it no matter what. I'm not really into suspense-thriller movies, but this one is pretty cool. 2 words: "prune gang". Hahahahahahahaha!

Need sleep. Still have rehearsals in the afternoon.

Went to Megamall yesterday for the Arts and Music Festival held at Megatrade Hall 3. Miss Cindy and Sir Jethro was conducting an acting workshop in the morning, so I decided to check it out. We were already talking about going the night before, plus to see the show excerpts presented by the other groups, like CSB's Dulaang Filipino, Filipinescas, Repertory Philippines, and Ballet Philippines.

When I got to the venue the minute the mall opened (excited, hahaha), I found Miss Cindy along with her family, so we went inside together to check out the booths. After a while, we went inside the function room where the workshop was going to be held. Not much people around yet, mostly just performers.

Only a few people attended the workshop. Nicco, this guy named Vartouk (I forgot how to spell his name), a girl who looked like a dancer, one middle-aged guy with long hair, a middle-aged mom, 3 little kids, and me. So how was it? Nothing I've never done before. We did that wall and rope exercise Miss Cindy did during one of our rehearsals, and then a "Paint Me a Picture" activity. That was it. Well, there's only so much you can do in one hour anyway.

After the workshop, Nicco and I waited in the main audience area of the hall for Dulaang Filipino's show excerpts from Tabi Tabi Po and Uyayi ng Ulan. After that followed a couple of dances by CSB Filipinescas (one by Stephen). Hahaha, what came next was what I was waiting for. Hahaha, Mish suddenly appeared next to me to watch as well. Repertory Philippines' song excerpts of Little Shop of Horrors, with Joel Trinidad as Seymour and Amparo Sietereales (did I spell that right?) as Audrey. I want to watch this show. Then came Ballet Philippines. Wheee, I've been enjoying more of BP's shows recently, and this one is no exception. I especially loved the last two dances they did, it was so amusing.

After all that, Nicco wanted to reload his phone with credits, so Mish and I left Megatrade to go with him. He was also looking for the place where he can get an FX to Antipolo, because yesterday was the blessing of their new resort. He had invited us to go earlier during the day, but I was having second thoughts sometime in the afternoon. Ehehehe, after a late lunch at Shakey's, Mish and I ended up riding with him all the way to Antipolo. It was my first time to commute there, and my second time to actually go there (the first time was during an immersion trip in high school, senior year, and the second time was for a YFC youth camp).

I liked the resort. The prices for renting it wasn't bad either. We were already thinking that the place would be good for our next cast outing, as well as for Clokworx. I especially loved the ambience on the second floor, with all those pretty lights. Wheee, heeheehee.

The three of us ended up just talking the hours away. Hahaha, the things to sum it up were all on Mish's speechless expression. Plus my wild brain's imagination, gak, wahahahahahaha.

When we were all about to leave, Nicco's dad invited us to watch his show at Klownz in Quezon City, but I had to decline because my mom was already telling me to go home. Hahaha, we were even parked outside the venue, and I still couldn't accept the offer. So we ended up bringing Mish back to her dorm, and Nicco and I commuted the rest of the way home.

I forgot to mention this. When Mish, Nicco and I were on our way out of Megatrade, we passed by Repertory Philippines' booth, where they were showing a video of some class' showcase. Mish suddenly squealed (hahaha, that's the only way I could describe it) because the video being shown was their showcase of Merrily We Roll Along several years ago! Hahaha, there was a little Mish and her long mop of curly hair, a very young-looking Caisa as Beth, and a pudgy, young Reuben as Frank.

By the way, I got to watch Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events last Saturday. Got annoyed at Jim Carrey, hahaha. Violet was such an interesting character, though. And I enjoyed watching the closing credits, hahaha. Kinda reminds me of Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas.

Oh yeah, a shoutout to Caloi of the Bystanders!

Interesting.

Got this from a thread in PinoyExchange...

Q: How do u make the invisible visible?

A: make it invisible.

...u make 'papansin' because u're invisible. but when u decide to become intentionally invisible, that's when they make u visible by looking for u.